Blessings Counted

Sanctus Real

Being home for a week while coughing my head off and using several boxes of Kleenex, I've had the chance to do a whole lot of nothing.  I mean nothing in the sense that my regular household routine (which was not exactly flawless before, but had potential) all but stopped.  Let the guilt rise up!

Well, I battled the guilt with the fact that hey- we might not all be capable of continuing on with daily lives even while under the weather, and that is okay.  Also, we're allowed a few sick days here and there.  Guilt be gone!

However, along with the guilt came a whole other plethora of feelings that can easily come when I have not gone anywhere (or not had Starbucks) in 8 days that make me feel sad, wishy-washy, ho-hum...an Eeyore!

Dealing with unemployment issues, trying to avoid the doctor, and the trepidation of my district possibly rehiring me soon (and by trepidation I mean that yes being rehired would be wonderful, but what grade I teach and what school I teach at could be completely at their mercy, but that's how it always goes, right?), the crazy new life as a substitute teacher never knowing when or where I'm going...it all leaves me feeling unsettled, pinchy, and breathless.

All that to say, I've had enough!  Who wants to go through life feeling pinchy?  You know pinchy: the tight feeling in your face and chest and even your hands that accompanies worry, anger, and dismay.  Bitterness, grouch-grouch... etc. I certainly don't want that! 

So I abandoned my pinchy face and tried a smile.  Just one to start. It felt SO good.  I mean, it felt good even in my tummy and my toes.  Like...better than chocolate good.  A simple smile. I guess I hadn't done that in awhile.

I thought of something good.  A friend getting the perfect job after a long wait, a community rallying together after a horrible fire, my dog taking a nap in the sunshine, a young boy who has had a successful surgery...these are good things!  These are the blessings from the Father above. Things that make me smile.  And the more of them I thought of, the more smiles that came.  And I realized...things are NOT that bad.  Things could be worse. 

Now don't get me wrong, there are people in my life who are truly struggling and I don't wish to make it seem like I've forgotten that.  I haven't and I won't.  There will be trials that we face...and who knows better than Jesus--whom was mocked and scorned, suffered awfully and was crucified. Trials WILL be there. But I will choose to try my hardest to start looking on the bright side.

And that's what it is, I guess...a choice.  I can choose to be sad  or I can choose to be happy.  Because we all know that bad things are going to happen in life and we can't control them. We all know the benefits of happy!  Better for your health, better for your mind, better for your skin (less wrinkles, because of no frowns, right?) and even better for your relationship with God. 

There is a song by Sanctus Real that came on the radio today...it happened that I needed to hear it today.  I love this part:

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is You want from me


"Time to begin again".  I LOVE that. Each day is a new beginning, isn't it?